Category Archives: Story

Kara: “Oh, can I phone a friend?” Jason: “Who?” Kara: “My ranger from my other campaign.” Jason: “…No.” Kara: “But she can track!” Me: “If you’re calling Lanara, I’m calling Scarlet and asking if I can borrow her sword.”

Kara: “Yaaaaay, you got rescued by your proper NPC romance-match!” Chris: “What?” Me: “What?” Jason: “What?” Kara: “Yeah. What?” Jason: “I think Sophia already addressed that, which was, ‘He wishes.’” Me: “No, that was Stormwalker.” Chris: “Well, I’m sure there … Continue reading →

Jim: “Is this in the top 3 worst things that Paul’s summoned?” Jason: “No…wait…yes. Probably yes.” Me: “Well he summoned Perpenna…and Heinrich Himmler….” Chris: “Would you believe I really enjoy off-label uses of Presence?” Jason: “I’ve noticed.” Jim: “Did he … Continue reading →

“This is becoming the quintessential vampire game, in that the Toreador is asking what other people think of him and the Brujah is trying to remember where she left all her guns.” —Jason

Me: “Yeah, am I Sabbat now?” Chris: “No, you’re kinda on the Path of Michael Bay.” Jason: “Ha! The Path of Bay! Sin #1: Failing to explode things. Sin #2: Good writing.” Me: “Sin #3: Looking at the explosions as … Continue reading →

Jason: “What are you doing with the gun?” Me: “Uh, carrying her on my shoulder.” Jason: “…I don’t think you quite understand how big Vera actually is.” Me: “I don’t think you quite understand how big I am!” Jason: “It’s … Continue reading →

Jason: “You see an armored Humvee and a bunch of soldiers. Two outside, one in the driver seat of the car, and one up top of the car with the machine gun. They’re probably around, oh, a dozen yards from … Continue reading →

Jason: “Roland was one of Charlemagne’s paladins. He died at the Pass of Roncevaux fighting the Saracens. With the aid of his magical sword.” Me: “…Magical sword, you say? What kind of magical sword?” Jason: “A sword that was indestructible and could cleave through … Continue reading →

Jim: “I want to play a Tzmitsce who is all about, like, free-range organic skin for his flesh-crafting.” Me: “OMG, hipster Tzmitsce!” Jim: “These flesh-chairs are locally-sourced!” Me: “These skin-books are all fair-trade!”

The dragon sneers. “I don’t know, leech, I don’t converse with many of your kind. Would you, knowing the rest of the Wyrm-begotten leeches in this city?” Paul shrugs. “Some of them, maybe….” (Jason: “Like Carlos!” Jim: “Does Carlos have … Continue reading →